Nov11

The Morning After

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The Morning After

“Shit. What time is it?”

There are 4 bottles left and it’s fucking 9:20 AM. I got to sleep at 4 last night and then had to wake up like a half hour ago. So there’s one more early (and I mean EARLY) wake up call left and I still have to dispose of the evidence. I need to find me a good bottle return machine, post-haste.

While it appears my typing has improved, I do believe I am still slightly tipsy. Not like last night’s drunken Diablo II where I was totally angry-cat-faced, but still a little sauced.

I think, for a moment there, I was about to get philosophical or something, but that moment has passed. I still can’t believe I was able to play Diablo II and beat Act II while hammered. Thanks go to Sharon, my bestest friend, who called me up with a rousing call to arms and showed me that even when drnka, I can still fight evil. Like that Legend of Drunken Master movie with Jackie Chan. Except with less kicking, as Sharon put it.

I’m going to drop my fool sister off at work. Then, I go back to bed.

Nov11

I’m drnka and full of rage

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I’m drnka and full of rage

So mission impossible turned out to be mostly possible.

4 bottels of booze left
i still gotta wake up early tomorow and sunday
to9 it hink

hahahah im so entertained right now

um…… less than 24 hours.
0 change of hangoves (*like thats happening HA!)
complete dispoalsal of all evide ce

thats the trickiest part i think. fucken bottles. i’m gonna get my nickel back for em i hope. if not, they’re totally going in some random dumpster. SRSLY, there’s no need for this shit, but it tota.llly is happening anyway and it sucks

I bet thits will be real funny to read tomoorrw.

yo its like 4 am here. i gitta gote to bed. errr, i gotta get to bed. i set my alarm before i got toasted, so i know it’ll ring tomorrow. i just dont know when, and it if sit a time where i set the alarm, its probably early, so i shoudl seleep.

“Dude. Wait… what?”

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Nov10

Fancy seeing you here…

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Fancy seeing you here…

So yeah, it’s been a while. (If I had a dollar for every time I started a post like this…)

Here is a quick and mostly worthless update for now, with a more fun filled and action packed update later. A note on the site: IE6 doesn’t display my menu at the top correctly. It works and everything, but “Saucy Stuff” shows up on two lines for no good reason. IE7 and all Firefoxes display it correctly.

As promised many moons ago, I’m going to post pictures of Nornan III’s final day resting in my driveway and pictures of Isabelle being sexy and leet and OMGWIN as she sits in Nornan III’s old space. Nornan III’s pictures will go up sometime today (probably after I finish typing this), while Isabelle’s pictures will go up this weekend.

Comment spam fucking blows. Because of this, I’ve closed comments on anything that’s not on the front page. I should probably just turn em off completely cause it’s not like anyone actually leaves comments. I’ve had like a half dozen legitimate ones since moving to wordpress.

Let’s see… I’m still waiting to hear back from some schools. Hopefully UNMC takes me for the Spring and I can finally get on with this book learning nonsense. Work is both hilarious and depressing. Depressing: Skelly and her wacky sidekicks are so dumb it hurts. Hilarious: They sure are funny, though. Also, in addition to reviewing books, I also review DS games. My reach expands mightily! Overall it’s not bad, but I can’t wait till I can tell them to insert various unpleasant items into a variety of orifices.

That’s it for now! Join us next time at the same bat-channel, who-knows-what bat-time!

Sep12

Behold the power of my wrath!

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Behold the power of my wrath!

In our last episode, I unleashed my unending wrath on the local gas stations. It seems that when I verbally abuse gas station owners, they listen! Not two days after my scathing diatribe, just about every gas station within a 10 mile radius started dropping their prices to match (or at least come close to matching) what BJ’s had. Not only that, but they’ve been steadily falling ever since! Now, most gas stations have all three grades under $3.00/gallon. There are still a few with expensive premium, but they’re dwindling fast. It’s a fine start, I must say, but that’s all it is: A start.

You see, one of the things that has enraged me as of late has been the disparity of pricing among the different grades. As far back as I can remember, each octane level was ~$0.10 more expensive than the one below it. But the past several weeks, the normal grade gas (87 octane around here) has been ~$0.20 cheaper while the higher grades didn’t come down in price at all. As I said earlier, since my last post, prices have dropped across the board at most of the local stations, but I won’t truly be mollified until the mid grade (91 octane) and premium (93 octane) prices come down to return to the days of a $0.10 seperation between grades. No other course of action is acceptable!

I challenge you now, gas station owners! I challenge you in the name of affordable gas prices that don’t cut into my video games, hookers, and blow budget! I say you must lower the mid and premium grades another $0.10 to keep the proper price spread! And then, if you have the backbone for it, you must continue your overall price reduction to bring us back to the halcyon days of our innocence!

Gas station owners, only you can save our freedom.

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Sep7

ZOMG I heart BJs!

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ZOMG I heart BJs!

BJ’s Wholesale Club, that is. Gas prices here, as everywhere, have been pretty retarded. I’ve heard from several places that the national average is something like $2.86/gallon. I wish that gas was that cheap around here. We haven’t seen prices under $3.00 for 87 octane gas (our regular grade) since last year.

UNTIL NOW.

I went to BJ’s today to get gas. The one near me has a gas station where they sell cheap gas that’s even cheaper if you’re a member. I, of course, am a member. (Thanks Mom!) I paid $2.96 for the premium that Isabelle demands. If I still had Nornan III, I’d have paid $2.74. Compared to prices over the last year, that’s fucking cheap. Compared to prices that those of us remember from only a few years back, that’s like only having a slightly splintered broomstick jammed up your ass instead of a broomstick riddled with rusty nails jammed up your ass.

Personally I like the minimal splinter variety, were I to be given a choice between the two.

What really gets me is that BJ’s seems to be the only place where this lowering of gas prices is occurring across the board. At other stations, the 87 octane regular grade anywhere between 10 and 20 cents higher per gallon than it is at BJ’s. But their mid grade (89 octane) and premium (93 octane) prices have not moved a cent for the last three weeks. NOT ONE FUCKING CENT. The majority of stations, regardless of corporate affiliation or local franchise ownership seem to have locked their mid and premium prices at $3.15 and $3.25, respectively. BJ’s non-member pricing for premium is $3.05. That’s a bit more than what other stations are selling their regular gas for (and in a few cases is dead even with the competitors’ regular gas prices). Now I ask you, what the fuck is going on here? I don’t know about the rest of the country, but here you can’t escape the constant whining on a variety of media outlets (especially News12 Long Island) about the poor oppressed gas station owners who have razor thin margins because the big bad terrorists and the corporate office and liberals and foreign policy and [insert scapegoat here] is making them charge high prices.

O RLY?!

You seem to have some decent prices for your regular gas. BJ’s is able to charge absurdly cheaper prices than you fuckers despite all the strife that you claim affects the oil industry as a whole. What I think is that you assholes have been making money hand over gas pump and are reluctant to give it up. I hope these fuckers drown in their filthy gasoline.

BJ’s Wholesale Club, I salute you!

Aug25

How Daljit of NORN Didn’t Get His Groove Back

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How Daljit of NORN Didn’t Get His Groove Back

A quick note before we begin: It seems that on IE, my custom banner at the top of my site looks like shriveled up ass. Once again, IE’s lack of standards compliance causes it to fail at life. How the fuck can it not do proper transparent graphics? Also, it seems that some other parts of my site don’t look like they should, thanks to shoddy CSS support in IE. Thanks a lot! View it in Firefox, which is a REAL web browser if you want to see how it looks.

Now that that’s out of the way…

So I’ve spent a good chunk of this summer doing things that don’t involve my computer much. I’m not really sure why. Since I’m not entirely sure where this odd behavior came from, I’m going to make up a reason.

Much like Stella, I wished to get my groove back.

I’m not sure that I was successful, however. From my impression of the movie “How Stella Got Her Groove Back,” she takes off from her life to go live in a cabana on a beach and has sex with cabana boys young enough to be her sons. Or maybe there was only one cabana boy. And I think she was married, too, but not to the cabana boy(s) she was sex0ring. Since I didn’t have rampant sex with cabana girls, I guess I don’t have my groove back, whatever that is.

Meh, I had fun.

Let’s see… I went to the beach a bunch. That was relaxing. There were no hot cabana girls, though. Sure, there were hot girls, but lets just say after a few… shall we say “near death experiences,” I chose, of my own free will and accord, to no longer pursue girls on the beach. Granted, I had tremendous success with this activity on one of my vacations, but I suppose circumstances were different then. It seems Long Island’s beaches are not the place to attempt to get my groove back. I suppose this requires a tropical locale.

Last weekend, I went into NYC and did some fun touristy type stuff and ate some damn good food. I got a neat dessert plate from Vaselka after stopping there to eat dessert. And just so we’re clear, it was the good dessert with the good sauce, not the crappy dessert with the crappy sauce.

In my rare bouts of using the computer, I re-organized my music collection, while catching up on DVR’d episodes of The Daily Show and The Colbert Report. I’ve got all my CDs ripped to FLAC (some already were, some weren’t) and all of what I want to be taken with me in alt-preset-standard mp3 files on my iRiver. My eMusic stuff is finally integrated with the rest of my music and everything is properly tagged. It feels good to finally have this done. It occurs to me that this paragraph is probably a low point in today’s post. Moving on…

You know, I have a whole bunch of blog posts queued up in my head that I want to write about, but whenever I sit down to do it, I get sidetracked into doing something else. Like this post. This wasn’t planned. I was gonna write about the recent spate of cancellations of good TV shows or about my personal sci-fi literature renaissance. There’s other stuff too, but this is what ended up coming out. Bah. See? No groove. It’s not back. Where’s hot tropical cabana girls when you need them?

I read a lot. I caught up somewhat on the backlog of books that I had. Now I’m itching to go get some more, which is bad, since I don’t have any shelf space to store them. I’d thought about e-books, but I can’t get behind reading a good book that way. I like the tactile sensation of reading a bound book. Oh, and speaking of e-books, my “job” requires that I read e-books so that I may “review” them. While they’re all well and good for clandestine ops behind enemy lines, in the comfort of my own home, I’d prefer a real book. I don’t think even an e-book on a PDA-type device wouldn’t cut it. Something just seems off. On the other hand, it does save quite a lot of space. :

I also watched a shit-ton of DVDs this summer. Some months ago, Deep Discount DVD had a pretty sweet sale and I got more TV show DVDs that I really should have. I’ve been watching em whenever I get the chance, and I’m still several box sets away from completion.

These would be my chief activities this summer, with some miscellaneous activities sprinkled in to taste. It was fun, but not groove-getting-back fun. That would have required hot tropical cabana girls and not hot Long Island girls with multiple boyfriends and/or male relatives hidden just out of sight waiting to murder foolish males attempting to recreate with their females.

Not that I would know anything about that.

Jul18

Stuff That’s Drad Vol. 1

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Stuff That’s Drad Vol. 1

Today’s Stuff That’s Drad:

  1. Pint Pal
  2. Rocketboom
  3. Amanda UnBoomed

I find that the past week or so, I’ve been repeatedly asking myself “Why doesn’t anyone ever tell me about this stuff?” Rather than site and grouse about it, I’m going to make the effort to bring my (not so) startling discoveries to you, my (un)loyal reader!

First, we have the Pint Pal, a device I found out about in the last few minutes. When you think about it’s existence, it makes sense and isn’t all that amazing that it exists, yet I didn’t know for certain that such an item could and would in fact, be real. Sure, there are similar devices for keeping your drinks cool, but ice cream? I guess I never imagined my glutinous eat-a-pint-at-once ways extending to the mass market. Who knew? (Note: I’m aware that probably everyone knew. Shut up.)

Second, we have a website by the name of Rocketboom. They tell me it’s a video weblog. I’m not sure as to what makes this different from one of those two minute news briefs that some network channels used to show back in the day, aside from the fact that it’s infinitely more interesting. It’s a short show about… stuff that’s cool, I think. I haven’t seen very many episodes as I only found out about this thing yesterday, but they seem to give you a daily dose of fun in a nice streaming video format of your choice. It doesn’t hurt that the chick who serves as the host of the show is pretty hot and has a sweet accent. This show is fun and unique and that by itself would be enough to make me say “Why doesn’t anyone ever tell me about this stuff?” However, there’s more to this story! It would seem that this has been “on the air” as it were for some time. It was previously hosted by another smoking hot chick and from what I hear (now, after the fact!) is that the previous host and the guy who started it all had some sort of falling out and everything has gone to hell now. Or something. I’ve seen a few shows with the old girl and a few shows with the new girl, and yes, while the old girl is better, that doesn’t mean the new one sucks. She’s pretty good too. What I need to do now is catch up on the fucking YEAR AND A HALF of shows I’ve missed and wedge a few minutes in my daily routine to watch the new episodes of this. (Note: When I call this show a news show, I use the term “news” loosely. It’s much more fun and interesting than that.)

See, this is the kind of thing where I sigh in an exasperated manner and ask:

“WHY DOES NO ONE TELL ME OF THESE THINGS?!”

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Jul4

Le sigh.

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Le sigh.

Why am I up this late and not tired? I should be tired. I want to sleep, but not really. I know I should sleep, even though I don’t have anywhere to be tomorrow. It’s 2:13 AM; sleeping is simply what’s done at this time by polite society.

I’m polite society, right?

Shouldn’t I sleep? I want to… do… stuff. Like watch a DVD or play a video game or read a book. But then I think about actually doing it and I’m like “Nah, I don’t really want to do that. I honestly have no desire for it.”

I should sleep. That would be a good thing, I think. I wouldn’t be suffering from this ennui. But I’m not too sure that I want to sleep. I could get in my car and go someplace, but gas is expensive to just fritter away and also there’s not actually a place for me to go here at 2:16 AM.

Then again, there might be a place to go here at 2:16 AM, but I bet its where the cool kids go and I don’t get invited to those places. I’m not on the guest list.

I got a message on my voicemail on my cell phone. I wish I knew who it was from or what it was about. You know how when you talk on a cell phone sometimes and the other person’s words cut in and out because of bad reception or microwaves or gnomes or whatever? It was like that. I think I heard maybe 3 complete words and the rest was grunting sounds and halting nonsense. It was so bad that I couldn’t even tell who it was. I hope it wasn’t important. I didn’t get any follow-up messages or anything, so I guess not.

I feel like I should have a real job. One with a real salary and real responsibilities and real humans that work there, not refugees from the glass sorting factory. Maybe I’m getting old or maybe its an effect of me graduating, but summer vacation is starting to feel wrong. I need a grad school or a real job.

It occurs to me that I haven’t used a single naughty word this entire post. I’m tempted to use one now, just because.

I don’t think I will.

Why is it that some people are all like “Naughty words are bad and only immature people say them” but then those same people who think this way also prevent the most immature people of all, children, from saying them. When children say naughty words these hypocrites are all like “Don’t say naughty words because its bad! That’s adult language and you’re not an adult.” Something about this… something about it just doesn’t seem right, you know? Is it adult language or immature language? The movies seem to think its adult language because they don’t let kids see movies that have naughty words in them.

I use naughty words. A lot. What does that make me?

I have no idea when to use “its” and when to use “it’s.” MS Word’s grammar check yells at me whenever I use one and makes me change it, but then it yells at me again and makes me change it back, and then it yells again and this goes on for some time. I think I knew once which one to use when, but now I don’t. I should look it up.

You know what’s really bad? I’m writing this and I’m not even drunk or high or anything. There really is no excuse for it.

Jul1

Dead Rising Makes Me Want An Xbox 360

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Dead Rising Makes Me Want An Xbox 360

Dead Rising Hands-On – Xbox 360 News at GameSpot

zOMGWTFBBQ!!11eleventy!

I haven’t been interested in the X-box 360 since I found out that the Perfect Dark sequel kinda sucked. I haven’t given it a glance. But then, as I was reading the Ars Technica forums, I came across the above link to what could be the greatest game of all time. I hate you Capcom, for not planning this for the Super Gamecube. Maybe by the time this game comes out, a used 360 can be had for cheap.

Yeah, and while I’m wishing for stuff that won’t happen EVAR, maybe she will suddenly decide to become the future Mrs. Enforcer.

🙁

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